My mom and dad came to town for this last cycle. It was great to have them both here and I was so glad my dad could see me again. The last time he was in town was cycle one, which means he probably had a bad picture in his mind on how I was doing each cycle. I was glad for him to see me functioning and being more like a human compared to what I was like during cycle one.
So here's a recap of how cycle 4 went. It's a little boring but I like to post a day-by-day recap for all the family that asks how it went, but more importantly for any other cancer patients reading my blog. When I was diagnosed and before I began treatment I was scared to research it but also eager to read/hear how people did on treatment to give me an idea of what to expect. Obviously everyone is different but it helps to know how others felt.
Wednesday June 24th:
Infusion went well and I felt pretty good most of the day. Around 6 I started to feel a little off but it wasn't horrible. I went to bed at 9:30 and would doze off, then wake up and feel slightly nauseous so after a few times of this I took one of my Lorazepam pills, mostly because I knew it would knock me, which it did. And this ended up being the only nausea medicine that I took during the entire cycle 4, yay!
Thursday June 25th:
Thursday I felt pretty good all day. I always have to go to the hospital to get my Nulesta shot after chemo and I have always gone for a short dog park walk on the way there, but unfortunately work was too busy and I wasn't able to do this. And again, I felt good, but definitely more tired this time, so even if I had time I am not sure I would have gone. I try not to push it during the week after chemo. I figure just rest, relax and during recovery week I can be active.
Friday June 26th:
Team KT's anniversary day! It was a busy day at work. To the point that even when I feel healthy this type of day would have made me tired. And then after work I had to create and wrap Tony's present. Okay, my mom ended up wrapping his present for me, but I did make the gift! So by the time Tony got home I was pretty tired. Tony wanted to go to dinner if I was up for it, or go up to the Prince Creek area to open gifts while we stared at Mt. Sopris (he knows me well). But I didn't feel up for leaving the house, especially since it was so hot out. So my mom left to run errands to give us space while we opened gifts and hung out at home. That night my dad arrived at 10:20. I knew he wouldn't mind if I went to bed before then but I was excited to see him so I stayed awake. I was in bed by 10:30 though. :)
Saturday June 27th:
My parents day tripped to Crested Butte and I was so happy they could do this. My dad loves a scenic day trip just as much as I do, so I was so thrilled he could make it to one of my favorite places in Colorado. As always, Crested Butte delivered for them; they loved it and said it was so gorgeous.
I had considered going with them as I felt pretty good that morning. But I was also worried that I would start to feel sick in the middle of the drive and then be stuck and/or ruin their trip and I really wanted them to see CB. We decided that if I felt up for it, and if timing worked out for them we could meet in Marble at the BBQ joint for dinner. So even though I felt well enough to maybe go for a little hike, I had a lazy day at home with Tony so that I could conserve my energy in the hopes I would feel well enough to go to dinner. I did do a 30 minute at home yoga sesh though! Unfortunately timing was a little off for dinner. We would have been meeting for dinner at 7:30 in Marble and that was too late for me. I told my parents they should go, which they did check the town out but they came home and then we ordered White House pizza and hung out. I felt well enough to even have some pizza! But I mean, I am never one to turn pizza down, especially White House.
Sunday June 28th:
This was an eventful day. We started the morning off with a trip to the Smithy for breakfast. Then, even though I tell myself to not push it during this first week I was going stir crazy staying in my house and I just wanted to get out and do something, anything. So we decided to go for a small hike. I took them to Thompson Creek because I knew it was a fairly flat hike, near a creek, and was in an area we had never taken them too before. We probably hiked half a mile out on the trail. And during this half mile, we stopped 2-3 times and sat by the creek. Umm...chemo was definitely affecting my body. It was pretty funny how slow I was and how often I wanted to stop and rest. At the same time, I was also telling myself to just sit and enjoy the breaks because the point was to kill some time away from the house. This is really hard for Kelli and Tony. We are sooo bad about not "stopping to smell the roses." And truthfully I love that we are both on the same page about this. We get to the top of a summit, we snap some photos, we eat a snack, we ponder a thought or two and we are on to other adventures. And my parents, especially my mom are the same way. I think my mom is actually worse than Tony and I. But everyone did really great about just sitting by the creek. Thankfully we had Lubby to entertain us.
After maybe an hour of being out on the trail we headed back to the car. My dad, who really tries to do at least 20 minutes of exercise at an elevated heart rate said he was going to go ahead and walk fast to get that exercise. Apparently my pace was not creating an increased heart rate for him. So weird, I mean it had my heart going! :) As he went blundering past I thought to myself "Did we make a plan of where we are meeting him?" And then I assumed two things, which I should know better than to assume in this family. 1. He'll probably just do what he always does in this case, walk out a little ways and then walk back and meet us at the car. and 2. I have cancer, I am in my chemo fog, my brain does not work, I am allowed to be like a 4 year old and not be responsible for making the game plan. Oops.
Tony, my mom and I slowly make our way back to the car, very slowly. We sit at the car for a moment and then Tony says let's go up the road and see if he is walking along it waiting for us to pick him up. So we go a ways and don't see him and then decide maybe he went up the road the other way (not the way home) because it was steeper and went up a hill. (My mom and I know that when he is getting his exercise he has to be walking at least on flat terrain or preferably uphill). So we turn around, drive back and head uphill. I have been on this mountain road before, but I forgot how there is no turnaround areas for a ways. So we continue up and up and up and I slowly start to freak out a little inside. During all of my chemo anytime I do actually go out and do something I always like to have an "escape route" figured out. If we go to the movies with friends, I like to drive separate so that if I get sick I can just leave. As we crept up this mountainside trying to find my dad, my escape route was getting challenged more and more. I kept calm and we eventually turned around and got back to the trailhead. At this point we have no idea where Rick is or what his plan was. It had been about 30 minutes since we had separated. I am trying to stay calm but really not liking the situation. 1. Because my escape route is disapperaing and 2. Because this is actually how people get lost. I wasn't too worried about him getting lost but the thought was there. Thankfully he showed back up at the car. On the drive home I tried to keep my cool as the three of them sat arguing about what happened, but I eventually yelled at them all. Through tears I first apologized and then explained how I didn't care who messed up, I was just frustrated because in this situation I can be of no help and I need them to get their shit together and make a committed plan. That shut them all up for a while, which then made me feel worse. But the good part was, we killed a lot of time that day, which made me really happy!
My parents spent the afternoon hiking around Independence Pass. And that night we went to Smoke for dinner. A pulled pork sandwhich sounded delicious and I knew how much my dad liked to go out to dinner so we went.
Monday June 29th:
I felt pretty good this day. I didn't have as bad as chemo brain as I normally do this time of the cycle. Work was super busy as we had 5 closings that week, 4 of which were the next day. So thankfully I was very distracted all day with work. I did have the achy muscles that I normally do, but again it wasn't too bad.
Tuesday June 30th:
This was very similar to Monday. I felt bad because it was my mom's last day and I really wanted to go for a short walk with her but I was just so tired. From chemo, from work, from the heat. I had no will to do anything. I just wanted to lay on the couch and binge watch Parenthood. This is always the day that I seem to mentally have a hard time. And although this Tuesday it wasn't that bad, I definitely was tired of feeling so lazy, lethargic, boring, and like I had gained 20 pounds in a week. That's okay though because I knew it would pass and in a few days I would feel better.
Wednesday July 1st:
We did it! We made it to July! Since April when I had learned about cancer, and chemo, and what my treatment plan was I just kept telling myself once July rolled around I would be through the worst of it. So I was sure excited for this day! And I felt pretty good most of it and we went to yoga that night, which of course made me feel a lot better!
Thursday July 2nd:
I went to the gym to do a very light, easy workout. This consisted of some strict press, strict pullups, and KB rows. Very low-key, as I learned my lesson two weeks prior when I went too hard.
Friday July 3rd:
Friday was a productive day at work, then I biked to the new gym to check it out. In a few weeks Sopris will have a new location and we are so excited! It's so much bigger! That night Tony and I had Carly and Jon over for dinner and cards. It felt great to be seeing friends and being social again. I felt like for 8 weeks I had mostly been a hermit, only seeing Tony, family, or maybe an occasional friend. I know that's not true and that each recovery week I saw friends, but it's amazing how when you go a week of not seeing someone it feels like forever.
Saturday July 4th:
Tony and I were planning to go camping with 3 other couples in Buena Vista, which is 2-3 hours away. They were all out there Friday and if I felt well enough Saturday we would join. I was hesitant to work out that morning because I didn't want to over do it. But Sopris had their 9 AM Saturday class and Jenny Labaw was coaching. She is a games athlete who grew up in this area and although she currently lives in California she visits frequently and always stops by the gym. I had never had the chance to meet her and I would never pass up an opportunity to be coached by such a phenonemnal athlete, so I decided to go to 9 and do what I could. It was a team workout:
24 Minute AMRAP (As Many Rounds as Possible in that time period)
Partner 1: Run 200 Meters
Partner 2: 2 Rounds of Cindy (1 round is 5 pullups, 10 pushups, 15 air squats.)
Tony already worked out at 7 AM so I asked him to be my partner so that I could modify and/or just go at a slow pace without ruining someone else's workout.
It is amazing how at 3,2,1 go my brain just clicks. It forgets about cancer and chemo. It forgets about how weak I may be, how much exercise I have not done in the past few weeks. It just clicks right back into that old crossfit mentality of intensity, working hard, being pushed by those around you, etc. It always takes me a few minutes after the start of the workout to come back to reality, usually from a big rush of fatigue to remind myself I need to slow down, take rests, and take it easy. Especially when it's a 24 minute workout. So after a few rounds of Cindy and rowing (running is too hard right now so I row instead), I slowed it down and dropped my row distance and only did 1 round of Cindy. That was much better for me. Overall the workout went way better than I expected! I knew I would have a lot more fatigure this cycle and figured it would carry over to my workouts. It was not as bad as I thought it would be. And it also helped to have such a great coach! Jenny is a stud. I love all the coaches at Sopris, and all the other gyms I have belonged too. But she is the most active coach I've seen. Running around helping people become better athletes. Thanks Jenny and Sopris!
After the workout Tony and I decided to stay in town. I was pretty nervous to go primitive camping so far from civilization. I knew nothing would go wrong, but it made me a little worried so close to my last A/C treatment. I was also worried about being out in the sun all weekend. And because Sopris signed the lease on the new building, they were doing all the demoing on Saturday and I really wanted to help....or have Tony help while I sat there and watched. :) So after a delicious breakfast at Town the boys headed to the gym and put their functional fitness to work! I came by a little later with snacks and hung out for a while with Jen and Lari. Around 2:30 they finished up for the day and we headed to the river so Tony could jump in and soothe his achy muscles and wash the filth off his body.
At 4 we headed to Mer & Jeff's house for a BBQ with friends. To all my friends that know I am no "susie-homemaker" aren't you impressed with my pretty side dish? :)
The afternoon was filled with volleyball, gorgeous views of Sopris, jeeping to a super cool teepee, good friends, plethora of dogs, including a puppy, yummy food, kids, and of course fireworks. It was the perfect afternoon for me!
It was probably the biggest day I had yet and when we rolled in at 9:30 at night I still had enough energy to hang out and watch a little TV with Tony.
Sunday July 5th:
Good morning world. At 5 AM my body was ready to wake up. A little sore from all the pullups and pushups the day before, but feeling pretty good. I spent the morning working on my blog and then at 9 AM we rolled out to the gym for a little workout. I did some squats. Tony told me to do an EMOM of 2 backsquats and although it called for 85% of your 1 rep I knew there was absolutely no way I could even do that weight (225#) one time, so I worked up to a heavy weight (175#) and went for it. It's a little frustrating to be 50 pounds under the weight you are supposed to do. But I remind myself in a week I will be way stronger than I am right now because the A/C is still in my system. And it will come back either way. Then I did a little metcon of back extensions, toes to bar, overhead walking lunges, and bench press. And finished it up with a postwod of abs: russian twists, planks and medball situps. It felt good to be sore from yesterday, and working out today.
Next chemo infusion is on Wednesday. That's when I begin Taxel and I pray that it goes as well as everyone tells me it will go. It's obviously still chemo, but everyone has told me compared to A/C it will be a breeze. I've been told by friends that have been through it that I will feel so much better and fairly close to normal. I've been told I will feel up for camping and adventures like that. Crossfit will still be hard, my body is still dealing with all the chemo but hell, I did crossfit through A/C, so I have high hopes for the next 12 weeks! :)
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